Worst Two-Hour Block on Network Television?

Have you ever turned on the television and then been too lazy to change the channel (well, we know that part is true) and "accidentally" sat through two hours of the lamest broadcast network garbage you can imagine?

I hope not. Have some self-respect. We live in a world of remotes. Press the buttons, already.

However, one look at the winter schedule the networks are foisting on us right now opens up a world of weakness.

For example, ABC has two hours of The Bachelor tonight. That's a big bowl of sad, people. Watching that just tells the world that you are no longer living the dream. On Tuesdays, the CW has an hour of One Tree Hill followed by an hour of Hellcats, which roughly translates to seven hours of visual pain. Why would anyone do that to themselves?

On Wednesday, NBC's combo of Minute to Win It and Chase is like dumb chasing predictable. It's the kind of lineup that not only has no flow to it, but there's no one on earth who could write a reasonable defense of watching either back-to-back.

But my vote goes to NBC tonight for packaging The Cape and Harry's Law together. How could this be more heinous than what the Peacock dishes out on Wednesday, you ask? Easy. Minute to Win It is cheap reality programming. Any third-level executive could shepherd that witless hour onto the air and get a better office out of it. Chase is the kind of show you put on the air when you can't make Justified and you don't know any good writers.

But The Cape looks like something that people were excited about -- they had the ambition to make something different. And Harry's Law is from David E. Kelley, who talked Kathy Bates into the title role.

Translation: Unlike the other two shows, some heavy lifting, organizing and greenlighting took place for these Monday shows. And what are we left with? A guy in a cape. In a show that looks like it wants to be something other than what the guy in the cape wants. Plus, he's in a cape. No matter how many ways you draw that up on a napkin at the bar, you were drunk and you had a terrible idea. There's no fixing it now.

As for Kelley and Bates, well, have you seen Harry's Law? If the newbies at NBC haven't fired the people behind this show, then good luck with that overhaul. Harry's Law is the kind of show that someone at USA would scoff at. Obviously, the problem came well before the pilot got shot. But once it was actually filmed and screened for executives, nobody said the words they should have said. And those words are: "You're kidding me, right?"

So, that's my vote. Two hours of bad television that took actual muscle to get on the air. Those are big failures. Those are the shows that you can't sweep into the dustbin of forgotten history when they get canceled. And they will get canceled. Those are the kinds of shows where people say, "Remember the guy with the cape who wasn't  a superhero?" And, "What was the show that really proved Kelley was in a rut? No not that one -- the one with Kathy Bates."

And now, two networks and I'll dub the Terrible Trifecta: On Fridays, ABC has Supernanny, Primetime: What Would You Do and 20/20. Nothing says "the networks are turning Fridays into a graveyard like Saturdays" than that lineup. ABC should start a "Free Pizza Friday" promotion and feed any family willing to watch those three hours back-to-back. Then, on Sundays starting in March, NBC (are you sensing a pattern here?) will lay Dateline NBC, America's Next Great Restaurant and The Apprentice end-to-end. Really? This can only be one massive joke by the outgoing execs at NBC, right? "Let's blow the dust off of Dateline, and we'll plug that in there. What's that reality show that the intern came up with? Right, that follows. And -- get me legal -- do we still own The Apprentice? That hasn't been shuttered? Great, well, there's your 10 p.m. closer. Let's see the new regime make history again with those!"

Where's the pride, people?

If you've got better examples of the networks not caring for at least 120 minutes, do tell in the comments.

Email Tim Goodman at Tim.Goodman@THR.com