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MAY
15
5 MOS

Parvati Shallow Recaps 'Survivor': 'No Class' Kass

The three-time competitor and winner of "Survivor: Micronesia" shares her insights into the CBS show every week on THR.com.

Kassandra "Kass" McQuillen
Kass McQuillen

Survivor has finally brought this dysfunctional family of five to its breaking point. The game fosters an atmosphere of paranoia and insecurity; it has always had the capacity to cause grown men and women to regress to the 12-year-old versions of themselves, bullying one another with gleeful grins on their faces. Now, between power-hungry Kass and Tony's egomania, sparks are flying and all hell is breaking loose. Isn't this why you all love this show? It shows human nature at its most raw and competitive. 

Sitting within the insanity like a calm grasshopper rests our side-kicking foreign exchange student, Woo. The Keanu Reeves of Survivor, Woo is simply here enjoying the surf and occasionally walking on water. Lucky for him, he jumped in the boat with master manipulator, Tony, early on. Woo has become one of the standout favorites of this cast. He's warm, funny and loving. He has a huge heart and truly enjoys being out there on the island. Woo says he wants to sit next to Tony in the final three because he likes him, and they started the game together; what a romantic.

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Unfortunately, Tony, our whirling dervish puppet master, has other plans that don’t involve his sidekick, Woo. Tony's afraid, and rightly so, that Woo will beat him in the end. Sitting next to Woo in the finals would destroy everything Tony has worked so hard for. When Tony speaks of the impending betrayal, I cannot help but feel sick to my stomach. I know this is what Survivor has morphed into, and I've committed this same type of betrayal myself, but it still leaves me with a sinking feeling. Woo is sweet, and he's played a game that would garner him peer votes. Tony is playing with fire in his soul to win; this fire overwhelms all other human emotions of compassion. 

Tony's competitive fire spreads to all aspects of the game, including challenges. Unsurprisingly, he wins the reward challenge, and the reward that goes with it. Allowed to share his pizza delivery bounty with one other player, he chooses Trish. Trish, like Woo, has been Tony's closest friend and confidante since the beginning of the game. She’s lived under Tony’s umbrella of protection and hasn't had to do much to keep herself in the game. Plus, the woman is wasting away and desperately needs to eat. Tony holds the keys to her nourishment. Trish gleefully accepts Tony's kindness and joins him for a "last supper" on the beach. 

Brooding over her lack of love and pizza on the sidelines, Kass watches the gluttony. This woman has major control issues, and she enjoys pitting people against one another. If she doesn't feel included and empowered, all will suffer. Now, Kass is out for blood. Saying, "No one in the game should have that much power," she wants to break up Trish and Tony tonight.

Kass' hunger for control offers Spencer, our bottom dweller, another opportunity to wiggle his way into the final four. Spencer is still the biggest threat to win. He's played a good social game, continues to win immunity challenges and has a lot of friends on the jury. Tony is playing incredibly hard. He's pulled off huge blind sides, holds two immunity idols and is also a challenge threat. Tony needs to take out Spencer in order to have a shot at victory. 

Whoever wins this immunity challenge will control the outcome of the vote, and this is a huge vote.

The suspense is killing me. First, Tony pulls away with a huge lead allowing him to work on his slide puzzle minutes before anyone else. Then Spencer finally catches up. The brainiac works quickly to arrange his puzzle pieces and wins immunity!

Holy crap! I’m jumping up and down! This is the best possible outcome. 

Now, our dysfunctional family begins to unravel back at camp. Trish, who has been biting her tongue for the past couple of days, finally unloads on Kass. She calls Kass ugly names and tells her that she's done with her. Kass notoriously thrives in chaos. She likes it when people implode. She just doesn't seem too at peace with Trish's outburst. Kass may have dug her own grave this time. 

In a panic, she approaches Woo and sells him on the idea that Tony was planning to blindside him. Finally, Woo wakes up from his 36-day slumber and agrees. Now is the time to break up the pair of Tony and Trish. But they can't vote for Tony. He's protected by two idols. So that leaves Trish.

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This frenetic energy only intensifies as the gang gathers at Tribal Council. Jeff Probst loves it. This is Survivor therapy at its finest. Kass comes out swinging, accusing Trish of being a bitch. I have to say, this woman has no class. She also has no clue how to swing a jury in her favor. Isn't she a lawyer? I would like to see how many cases she has actually won in her time. I understand that emotions run high, but those who can keep their emotions in check are the people that actually win the game in the end. Those who can't end up getting brutalized by the jury and snapping back. This is what I envision going down for Kass should she make it to the finals. 

In the end, Trish is voted out. Even her partner in crime, Tony, writes her name down. As she walks out and wishes the rest of the players luck, Kass flips her the bird. 

Need I say more? 

Join us for Survivor Live today on CBS.com/survivor. I will be interviewing Trish, getting all the dish about her fight with Kass and Tony's betrayal. It's going to be juicy! Hope to see you there!