Future Amy Schumers Tell Present Amy Schumer How to Save the World From Total Ruin
"The lives of millions depend on you."
Inside Amy Schumer's new sketch features multiple Amy Schumers from the future coming back to tell present-day Amy Schumer how to move forward with her current relationship.
The Schumer from six years in the future says that in order to stop California from going underwater and Ebola from wiping out France, present-day Schumer needs to move in with her boyfriend (who will eventually give her gonorrhea and bed bugs) and reward him with a celebratory "blowj."
"If you don't mouth-hug his yogurt gun, it turns out things get even worse and Ebola knocks out all of France," says Future Amy Schumer. "Your relationship is somehow the butterfly wings that destroys the course of future events."
If that sounds complicated, wait until really-far in the future Schumer shows up with new instructions for Amy — and a laser gun.