Louis C.K. on His Weirdest NYC Moment (Hint: It Involves Puke and a Subway)

Meredith Jenks

The downtown dweller opens up about his favorite (and least favorite) memories from life in the Big Apple.

This story first appeared in the April 24 issue of The Hollywood Reporter magazine.

The Funniest Moments You Witness in N.Y.
I was on MacDougal Street one night, and there were these kind of mookie guys — chains and wife beaters — sitting on a car having a slice of pizza. Walking across the street were these very glamorous party girls — tall, gazelle-like chicks — and behind them were these two little dumpy Italian washer women with curlers in their hair. The guys with the chains say to the beautiful women, "Hey baby, come hang out with us." And one of the little dumpy women walking behind the ladies goes, "I'm not going anywhere with you." Everybody laughed: The guys laughed, the beautiful women laughed. People share humor here very well.

 

The Weirdest Thing You See on a N.Y. Subway
One time a guy was sitting across from me and staring at me with this angry look on his face. He started to get more and more upset, and I didn't under­stand what was going on. Then he threw up. That's when I realized he wasn't looking at me.

 

 

The Best Advice for a New New Yorker 
It's all too much to take in, but see the Village. That's a good place to start.

The Worst Parts of N.Y.
I kind of hate Columbus Circle because you can't walk through it easily. I sure don't like to be in front of the Empire State Building at certain times of the year. Times Square is pretty awful, and stay the hell away from anywhere above 42nd Street and below 80th Street from Thanksgiving to New Year's.

 

 

The Area of N.Y. I'd Revive
I miss Times Square when it was a totally dead place. It was complete death, none of the theaters were open, and it was all just weird little porn shops and, like, dead people literally lying on the street.

The Moment I Knew I'd Made It in N.Y.
Sitting on the floor of a Knicks game with Chris Rock. A guy is inbounding the ball, and his massive leg is right there. Chris and I just looked at each other and said, "We did good."

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