Patton Oswalt on How Emmy Win Is Just "The Flavor of Happiness" After Wife's Death
"Watching a bad movie with her or fussing about what we're going to pack for our daughter, like if we were going to go on a trip or a plane, that was happiness."
Patton Oswalt continued to reflect on the death of his wife, Michelle McNamara, on Monday's Conan. The comedian shared stories about how he and his daughter are coping with her death and his anecdotes blended grief with humor.
Oswalt spoke about his recent Emmy win, attributing it to McNamara and saying she was the reason his comedy was even considered for an Emmy.
"Obviously, yes I'm happy to have won an Emmy," said Oswalt, "But it's very abstract because it's the flavor of happiness, but there's no calories or nutrition there. It's like it tastes like it, but there's nothing."
He continued that he realizes "watching a bad movie with her or fussing about what we're going to pack for our daughter, like if we were going to go on a trip or a plane, that was happiness." Oswalt added, "That's what it actually felt like, for real. So it just feels like, for a long time, I'm just going to have the flavor of happiness." He says that the silver lining in this "swamp full of poison" is that he will know real happiness if he runs into it again, since he had it with McNamara.
Oswalt joked that his life with his daughter was like "every bad '80s sitcom" about a widower trying to raise a child alone. On a serious note, he calls telling his daughter her mother had died the worst thing he's ever had to do. Oswalt also recounted how his daughter's 6- and 7-year-old friends would ask him if he was sad and if he would get remarried.
The most funny yet bittersweet story was about a Polish flight attendant who ruined his plan to distract his daughter Alice from Mother's Day, and actually just spoke about how horrible it was to lose a mother.
"Now every holiday that comes up, I'm terrified that the Polish woman of doom is just going to loom up," he said.