Earlier this week we got our first look at Tak3n, the latest action movie starring Liam Neeson as a guy that looks like your dad but is really good at messing people up. In honor of the reveal, we took a look back at the film that started it all — and how much better all Liam Neeson movies would have been if only they were Taken movies.
In 2009 Liam Neeson first starred as Bryan Mills, a gravelly-voiced former CIA operative who was extremely good at threatening people over the phone. The movie was an unqualified success, and opened up a new chapter in the storied actor's career.
Going undercover with a cigar habit and a dye job, Mills joins a group of Iraq War vets who find themselves framed for a crime they didn't commit. If you've got a problem, and nobody else can help, and if you can find him … then maybe you can hire Liam Neeson.
After a slow-motion accident, Mills comes out of a coma only to discover that nobody knows who he is — including his wife (now played by January Jones). Car chases. Guns. Boiling teakettles. You know who's going to win in the end.
Mills is stranded in Alaska with a number of oil workers after a frightening plane crash. As if the freezing cold and harsh conditions weren't bad enough, there's also a pack of giant wolves hot on their trail. With just a knife and a picture of the woman he loves as weapons, Mills must face his destiny.
In this comic book epic, Mills appears in a brief cameo to reveal his own past as a mysterious, mythical criminal. The biggest takeaway? Add some crazy facial hair and anybody can be a supervillain. (Don't forget to check out Bane's freestyle, either.)
Finally able to assume his own identity once more, Mills travels to Istanbul — only to have his wife kidnapped this time. Some guys really do have all the bad luck.
Posing as an air marshal on an international flight, Mills starts receiving mysterious text messages. They're not just telling him he's using a really old phone with a flip-out keyboard, though; they're warning him there's a bomb on board. Will he be able to stop the threat? Who is behind the crimes this time? And why can't anyone come up with a better way to portray texting on the big screen?
Now working as a private investigator, Mills is hired by a drug kingpin to track down the thugs who killed his wife. Everything goes well until the bad guys make one critical mistake: They call Mills on the phone. Game over.
After leaving the world of thugs and criminals behind him, Mills starts his life anew, working as a news anchor for the History Channel. A man can't deny who he is, however — and when a battle breaks out between warring news teams, Mills grabs his trusty sword to battle once more.