Now It's Official: Area 51 Does Actually Exist

Newly declassified government documents reveal that, sure enough, there really is a real-life Area 51 in the Nevada desert.

Somewhat surreally, somewhat wonderfully, the rumors (and movies, and television series and and and) are true: Yes, Virginia, there is an Area 51, as newly declassified documents from the National Security Archive of George Washington University confirm.

The real Area 51, however, was created as a base for the U-2 aircraft, intended for long-range reconnaissance missions, instead of storing alien invaders and other supranatural ephemera that the government had managed to accumulate (All that stuff is stored in the real-life Warehouse 13. Hey, it could happen).

"On 12 April 1955 [CIA officer] Richard Bissell and Col. Osmund Ritland (the senior Air Force officer on the project staff) flew over Nevada with [Lockheed's] Kelly Johnson in a small Beechcraft plane piloted by Lockheed's chief test pilot, Tony LeVier. They spotted what appeared to be an airstrip by a salt flat known as Groom Lake, near the northeast corner of the Atomic Energy Commission's (AEC) Nevada Proving Ground," explain the official documents (as reported by the Atlantic). "After consulting with [the CIA's] Dulles, Bissell and Miller asked the Atomic Energy Commission to add the Groom Lake area to its real estate holdings in Nevada. AEC Chairman Adm. Lewis Strauss readily agreed, and President Eisenhower also approved the addition of this strip of wasteland, known by its map designation as Area 51, to the Nevada Test Site."

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With this information now officially confirmed, it's only a matter of time before the official government papers about faked moon landings and secretly holding the Ark of the Covenant in a crate in some massive storage area are released, right?