Since its inception a few years back, the Goop Gift Guide has become a parody of itself, owning its reputation for comically absurd gifts a la $8,300 yurts or $15,000 solid gold dildos.
This year’s guide is no different, offering Gwnyeth Paltrow’s wealthy (and well-thy) readers a selection of over-the-top gift ideas for when their personal shopping assistants fall short.
While the site offers guides for every member of the one percent’s inner circle — from the under 18 set (how bout some Louboutin baby shoes? Or a trip to space camp?) to the host/hostesses (they definitely need a $10,000 bar cart) — the “Ridiculous, But Awesome” guide is where you’ll find the titillating stuff.
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Here, the Goop-iest gifts for the millionaires in your life:
1. A personal (yellow) submarine (price upon request).
Yellow submarines aren’t just for karaoke.
2. A private island from Sotheby’s Realty ($6M).
Regular islands are too crowded, you know?
3. A chocolate cutter (price upon request).
Yes, this is a real thing. No, I don’t know anyone who wants to share their Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup four ways.
4. A shoe tree ($6,600).
For when you run out of room for Louboutins on your shoe shrub.
5. A chair, we think (price upon request).
Can you sit in this chair? Who cares! It’s fancy!
