8:17am PT by Lexy Perez
Samantha Bee Calls for NRA Members to Join Scientology
Samantha Bee returned from a few weeks off with a brand-new episode of TBS' Full Frontal With Samantha Bee on Wednesday and took on the National Rifle Association, a group that has received increased scrutiny in the weeks since the deadly Parkland, Florida, high school shooting.
While Bee's peers have also gone after the NRA, she took a different tack, comparing the organization to the Church of Scientology and recommended current NRA members make their escape to the religion, for both groups are “universally disrespected.”
“The NRA is like a religion — specifically the best religion — Scientology,” the Full Frontal host argued. Bee then proceeded to show varied examples of the association’s similarities to the religion, including building structures, distaste for the media, “glammed” spokespeople including famed Scientologist John Travolta and the NRA's Dana Loesch and excessive spending on related accessories.
“Both of these cults are based on fanciful myths that when repeated enough, their otherwise intelligent followers start to believe,” Bee said. “One says that 75 million years ago, an intergalactic warlord nuked billions of people in volcanoes, and then there’s the really crazy myth: that guns have nothing to do with gun violence.”
Further making her argument, the host then implied that both aim to give followers an “awesome power.”
“Both of these messianic cults push the narrative that only they can save the world but if join them, you can share in their power. They’ll make you a superhero,” Bee argued. “Whether that means healing the sick with your mind or making a kill shot on a mass murderer despite being unable to even hit the toilet bowl when you’re taking a leak, and the only thing you need to do to get that awesome power is keep buying things from them.”
Following news that corporations such as Walmart and Dick's Sporting Goods have fought against the NRA, Bee emphasized that the association is “starting to crack under scrutiny.” With a growing opposition, she reiterated that it is possible for members to “break free from this brainwashing cult.”
“If any NRA members are hate watching us right now, there is hope,” said Bee, who then showed a mock campaign ad in which the Full Frontal host calls for NRA members to join the religion. “NRA members, we’re calling on you to break free from the NRA and join Scientology instead. Scientology can fill all the holes in your soul that the NRA currently does,” Bee says satirically. “It will bless you with fear, power fantasies, a creepily ageless leader and merch."
“Is Scientology safe? Oh, of course not! It’s bonkers!," she continues. "But it’s, like, safer for the rest of us. So, if it keeps you from feeling like you need to load up on AR-15s, then hail Xenu or whatever the fuck. Who needs a rifle to defend themselves when as an OT-7, you could blow someone away with your brain?"
Bee finishes the mock campaign with a jab at Hollywood Scientologist Kirstie Alley: “If you volunteer to be Kirstie Alley’s boat slave, at least you’re only hurting yours."