World Cup: Triumph the Insult Comic Dog 'Poops On' Crazy Fans in Bars (Video)

Conan O'Brien's Rottweiler puppet skit skips Rio's bars and heads straight to New York.

Triumph the Insult Comic Dog returns after an eight-month absence, and he’s just in time to “poop on” World Cup bars and parties in Queens, N.Y.

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After pondering the significance of soccer in America, Triumph — donning a Colombian jersey and his signature cigar — first stops in Astoria, where he questions whether the men he is talking to are 100 percent Colombian or something more insulting. Despite being completely unaware of the game, Triumph cheers (and then some) with his new Colombian family.

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His mockery doesn't stop as he continues to his next victims: Greeks. After stomping Greece’s poor economy deeper into the ground, Triumph learns which diners three men work at and actually compliments them on their invention of the alphabet. Triumph then does something very un-Triumph: He offers to buy everyone drinks, but only under one circumstance — if their last names have fewer than five syllables. Guess it didn’t take long for Triumph to be himself again.

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Triumph’s last target was the Uruguayans in Jackson Heights. His first jab was at their sky blue uniforms and how terrifying they must look to the opposing team. In between his own fits of laughter, Triumph tries to explain how every American sport — including Yahtzee — is more exciting to watch than soccer. Much to his own pleasure, Uruguay lost, and he uses that as fuel for the remainder of the video.