'Off the Cuff' Podcast: Comedian Sarah Colonna Asks "Has Anyone Seen My Pants?"

sarah colonna - P 2015
David Zaugh

sarah colonna - P 2015

The New York Times best-selling author and former 'Chelsea Lately' writer tells #THRpodcasts how a string of dating disasters ended in a storybook romance.

"Someone was like, 'For the rest of your life, you have that introduction if nothing else is going on,' " Sarah Colonna tells Off the Cuff about becoming a "New York Times best-selling author" with her first book, Life As I Blow It. The comedian, whom many also know from her frequent appearances on Chelsea Lately and stand-up performances around the country, will make another run at that list with her new book Has Anyone Seen My Pants?, out at the end of this month. The book is a hilarious, all-too-relatable account of the many awkward, disappointing and sometimes outright enraging relationships she endured in her 30's until she found (spoiler alert!) the man who is now her fiance. 

"I love your book," she remembers her publicist telling her, before adding, "I can't finish the last two pages. It's too annoying." Annoying, of course, the way it is when any good friend finds the happiness she deserves and that you can only hope to find yourself one day, which is exactly what reading Colonna's book feels like. After bouncing between secretly married guys, overtalkers, bad T-shirt wearers and always-traveling types, she struck up a friendly flirtation with a fan of hers over Twitter, who just so happened to be the future Superbowl-winning punter for the Seattle Seahawks, Jon Ryan. Colonna had already written a good portion of her book when the two finally met in person and quickly fell in love, adding a nice but unexpected twist to her story. ("I just remind myself that everybody it didn't work out with is just what led us together," Ryan graciously told her after reading it.)

Colonna is the first to laugh at this sudden twist of fate. "There's a country song called 'God Bless the Broken Road that Led Me Straight to You,' and that's what it sounds like," she says. "I used to make fun of anyone that would sing that song out loud, and now I'm like, 'Oh, I get it!' "

She also tells us why it's hard to perform in "sad cities" with lots of snow ("I can't even get out and go to the Applebee's"), what the most bizarre outbreaks at her shows have been ("Once in Florida — of course — a girl punched a bouncer") and why she let her friend fill out an online dating profile for her in what she calls a "reverse catfishing."

"I just want someone to have a love story off of FarmersOnly so badly."

Listen to Colonna's full interview in this episode of Off the Cuff, and be sure to subscribe to #THRpodcasts on iTunes for all the latest episodes.