Diddy Reveals How Kim Porter's Death Inspires Him to Put Kids "Before Anything Else in My Life"

Sean Diddy Combs - H Getty 2017
Getty Images

The family is still grieving, but Diddy described losing the model-actress, who was the mother to three of his children, as something that "changed" them and made them "love each other more."

Sean "Diddy" Combs is opening up about the sudden death of model-actress Kim Porter and how losing his longtime love has affected both him and their children.

"Before this, I was a part-time father, you know? My family was always first, but there are countless times when I chose work over everything else," Diddy told Essence. "But every day I can hear her telling me to go and spend some time with the kids and make sure everybody’s all right, like she would do. I’m just a lot more present, and, most important, now my kids come before anything else in my life."

The two began dating in 1994 and broke things off in 2007, and Porter was the mother to three of Diddy's six children. She died from pneumonia in November of last year. In the recent interview, he described Porter's "grace and poise," and said she's "unforgettable."

Though Porter's death was unexpected, Diddy revealed that three days before her death, she was feeling sick and told him, "Puffy, take care of my babies."

"On some level I knew she was training me for this. I knew that I had to be ready to do whatever I was supposed to do if something like this ever happened," he said. "There was screaming and crying when I heard the news, of course, but I had to ask myself, What would Kim do? I was scared, and I was crying out to God — and to her — and almost immediately Kim’s voice kicked in, and I could hear her saying, "Make sure you take care of my babies.'"

Diddy said he did just that, even jumping "into mommy mode."

The family is still grieving, but Diddy described Porter's death as something that "changed" them and made them "love each other more."

"I’m happy to say that, because at first I really didn’t know how we’d be doing. But God is the greatest," Diddy said. "And it’s because of Kim we’re doing this well, because of the way she loved us. We wouldn’t be able to love any other way. Her spirit wouldn’t let us."

Regardless, he still worries about his kids — especially his daughters. 

"One day I asked them how are they being so strong. They said that, in a weird way, their mother had taught them how to deal with death," Diddy explained. "About six years ago, Kim’s mother [Sarah Porter] was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer, and we moved her to L.A. She passed away about a year and a half later, so the girls saw their mother deal with losing her mother. Now, ironically, they are teaching me how to deal with Kim’s passing."