Tony Awards: Neil Patrick Harris’ 8 Best Jokes

PHOTOS: Tony Awards’ most memorable moments

Neil Patrick Harris kicked off the 65th annual Tony Awards on Sunday with a song and dance number about how “the Tonys are not just for gays anymore.”

During and after the performance, he took shots at several Hollywood stars as well as the troubled Broadway production Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark.

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Here are some of his best one-liners (some of which only those who have seen the shows might get):

— “Good evening. I’m teen heartthrob Neil Patrick Harris.”

— “Brooke Shields! You’re super hot! You made me think I was straight for like 23 years!”

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— “Angela Lansbury. You’re super-straight. Are those things real?”

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— “Al Pacino! You’re way too famous to participate in this bit.”

— “You should see backstage. Backstage is madness. I just had to stop Daniel Radcliffe from poking out the War Horse’s eyes.” (Harris later explained the joke was a reference to Radcliffe’s Broadway debut role in Equus.)

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Vowing not to spend all night doing Spider-Man jokes, Harris decides instead to cram as many as he can into 30 seconds (he fit in six), including:

— “I sent Bono [who composed the show’s music with U2 bandmate the Edge] a congratulatory cable, but it snapped.”

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— “[Ousted director and chief creative force] Julie Taymor found out it was over when she woke up with the head of War Horse in her bed.”

— “No audience members were harmed in the making of this musical … yet.”

The Tony Awards airs live on CBS.