Sally Potter's "Rage" shows that no matter how shallow, pretentious and irrelevant the fashion industry might be, there always will be a filmmaker who is more so.

The British writer-director has taken a bad idea for a radio play and tarted it up with highly stylized video that is supposed to be the work of a kid using a mobile-phone camera. She roped in some big names, including Judi Dench, Steve Buscemi, Eddie Izzard and Jude Law, to play characters at an unseen New York fashion show.

Plastered with makeup, they speak directly to the camera against a green, blue or red screen in a monotony of drivel having to do with what the kid with the camera is too clueless to go see for himself.

This involves some type of accident involving one of the models and a shooting, but it's unclear, and there's not the slightest reason to care. Boxoffice will be limited to members of the filmmaker's family, if that.

Reality TV appears to have eaten Potter's brain as she thinks that everyone, including those who design, produce, own, photograph and write about haute couture will rush to sit in a kind of "Big Brother" confessional seat and tell-all.

She clearly believes that only a kid would know that images shot on a digital camera can be uploaded onto some kind of interweb computer thingy that others can look at. She suggests that this is news to the rag trade.

Given complete rubbish to say and with such witless direction, the actors contribute uniformly the worst performances of their careers. It would be instructive to know what transvestite Izzard, for example, thinks of Law's insulting posturing as a painted, bewigged and drooling model named Minx. (partialdiff)