There's Something About Miriam



Fox Reality Channel
10 p.m. Wednesday, Oct. 31

Yes, there is something about Miriam, all right. She's a guy. Or, well, a pre-op transsexual, anyway. Welcome to "The Crying Game: The TV Series."

Six strapping heterosexual British dudes. One stunning Latin model. A mansion in Ibiza, Spain. The guys compete in this "reality" dating show to be the one who gets to go on a weeklong yacht cruise with Miriam and pick up £10,000 in the bargain. What they don't know, of course, is that she is in one very important area actually a he.

Fox Reality Channel snatches this show whole from the U.K., where it's said to have been a controversial hit nearly four years ago under the title "Find Me a Man." The suitors here don't become privy to their prize's true anatomical nature until near the end of their quest, which is simply cruel. Miriam offers that she is into "straight guys," so it's no wonder she has been so frustrated in her search for Mr. Right to this point. That whole penis thing clearly keeps getting in the way of romance. It also renders this exercise pointless and exploitative, not to mention somewhat appalling.

The contestants here engage in various physical challenges -- under the direction of a genuine no-nonsense drill instructor -- to impress the object of their affection. Previews from future episodes confirm that there is early speculation about Miriam's gender among the lads. It's irrefutable that Miriam, who was 21 when the show was made in 2003, is beautiful. But beyond her looks, it's also obvious she is pretty dim. Then again, so is "There's Something About Miriam" (dim, that is).

We learn that Miriam was born in Mexico, yet host Tim Vincent constantly refers to her as a "South American beauty." It's also particularly lame to craft an unscripted series that's so designed for utter failure, one that seemingly wants to be seen as a sociological experiment in transgender acceptance but plays instead like a shameful piece of deception.