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The pair took aim at billionaires Jeff Bezos and Richard Branson, the latter of whom recently became the first person to fly into space aboard a rocket he helped fund, effectively upstaging the Amazon founder, who announced in June that he’d be embarking on a similar mission July 20.
“Really, billionaires?” Meyers asked. “This is what you’re going to do with the unprecedented fortunes and influence, drag race to outer space?”
Poehler chimed in, telling the late night host she misses “the old billionaires.”
“The ones that wore top hats and ate caviar with their hands,” she continued. “Now all these new guys do is intermittent fasting and they learn Krav Maga so they can dodge all those taxes.”
Among those not going into space, Poehler pointed out, are any women. “Really!?!” the comedians said in unison, with Poehler adding, “Yeah, we’re staying down here ’cause we have to fix all the things. We have shit to do down here!”
But the way Meyers sees it, Branson didn’t really go to outer space. “You just went pretty high for a plane,” he said. “You went to outer sky.”
Poehler then reasoned that billionaires should simply have a midlife crisis devoid of rockets, but not without pointing to the obvious symbolism behind the expensive toys.
“The rockets are dicks,” she said. “The skyscrapers are dicks. I mean, even Freud is like, ‘You don’t need me for this, right? You get it. Those rockets are dicks.'”
Watch the complete segment below.
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