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Jimmy Kimmel continued his show’s visit to New York on Tuesday, venturing to Wonton Food, Inc., with sidekick Guillermo to learn how to make fortune cookies.
Kimmel and Guillermo met with James Wong, the fortune cookie writer for the company, who showed them the factory and the process of baking the cookie batter.
While showing Kimmel and Guillermo the fortune roll, which holds up to 4,000 fortunes, Kimmel asked, “Do people that are gluten free ever just buy the roll?”
When Wong explained that the paper wasn’t for sale, Kimmel suggested a new business endeavor where they sell fortunes without the cookies. “We’re going to make a lot of money, you and I,” the late-night host said.
Wong then took the pair to the fortune-writing room, which, to their surprise, was simply an office with a bunch of cubicles.
“It’s not as magical as I imagined it would be,” Kimmel said of the space. “This is where people’s fates are decided? In a cubicle?” Kimmel added.
After Wong suggested Kimmel and Guillermo write fortunes, the pair began brainstorming. Struggling with what to write, Kimmel asked Guillermo what he’d come up with. Guillermo’s offering: “Money is not everything, but you can buy a lot of expensive things.”
Kimmel’s suggested fortunes offered tips for customers: “Pay your bill and go home” and “There’s fried rice in your goatee.” Guillermo, meanwhile, compared fortune cookies to marriage, writing, “Fortune cookie is like a wife. You might get a good one, or you may not.”
After concluding their brainstorming session, Wong had Kimmel and Guillermo present their ideas to a committee, which rejected Guillermo’s “You’re about to eat a cookie.” fortune and Kimmel’s “How many orange chickens have to die before you people are happy?”
Although Kimmel was able to score some approvals for his fortune, “You will soon be coming into a large sum of Bed, Bath & Beyond coupons,” it was Guillermo who managed to receive nods from all committee members for his fortune, “Someone will buy you a tequila shot.”
Watch the sketch below.
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