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Because you didn’t go, did you?
You didn’t take the Amtrak train from L.A., with each car stuffed so full, it’s like fleeing on the last train out before a wartime occupation. You didn’t pay for a hotel whose rates have been jacked for San Diego’s annual Fleecing of the Fans. You didn’t beg studio publicists for tickets to their programs so you could circumvent the epic lines and actually make it inside the ballrooms since Comic-Con refuses to provide media passes. And you definitely didn’t have to deal with the world’s worst Internet access while trying to cover the panels, which makes no sense, since it’s a conference run by geeks for geeks, so you’d think they’d have all this worked out, right? Yet it’s like, I don’t know, using dial-up on AOL in 1996, and whenever anything particularly interesting and newsworthy happens on stage, like Joss Whedon declaring “I’m directing ‘The Avengers’!” it’s like an episode of “24” and somebody just set off a freakin’ EMP that blows out all Internet AND cell phone reception within a 2,000-feet radius. You also lucked out because you didn’t have to navigate the San Diego Convention Center’s byzantine Comic-Con human-traffic flow system, which is like being trapped in somebody else’s maze-dream in “Inception,” where the goal is to make sure you take the longest possible time to get to where you need to go, and you end up arguing with a teenage volunteer who’s standing between you and an open hallway and you’re saying, “But-but-but where I need to go is RIGHT THERE,” and he’s saying, “No, you have to go back out, and walk allllll the way around, because that’s the RULES.” And god help you if you get hungry during all this because even though there’s tens of thousands of people attending Comic-Con, there’s only a couple carts selling soft pretzels, cookies and nachos — how is that even possible?
No. It’s fine. You stayed home and found out all the same news instantly on Twitter.
I swear. It’s enough to make me want to stab somebody with a pen.
Anyway. Here’s Hollywood Reporter’s coverage of the TV panels. For film coverage, check out Borys Kit’s Heat Vision blog. Plus, we still have some more Comic-Con related goodies coming in shortly:
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