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On Wednesday’s Full Frontal, Samantha Bee took on Christine Blasey Ford’s allegation that Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh sexually assaulted her when both were high-school students, a claim that just recently came to light and has since dominated the news cycle.
“Well, we knew he was against a woman’s right to choose, we just didn’t know that included her right to choose not to be under Brett Kavanaugh,” said Bee.
Bee then shared that a number of politicians and pundits have rushed to the defense of Kavanaugh, though “some of them sound more like they’re confessing to something themselves.” A compilation of clips that feature men discussing their own pasts were then shared, including an audio clip of Sen. Chuck Grassley stating, “We’re talking about 35 years ago. I’d hate to have somebody ask me what I did 35 years ago.”
“Chuck, 35 years ago you were 50 and a senator,” responded Bee. “You looked like a cereal spokesman and were trying to ban abortion.” She continued, “Look guys, it’s freaking me out how much you need to insist that nothing you or your friends did in high school counted.”
“I can’t believe this needs saying, but it’s never OK to try to rape somebody. Not even in high school,” said Bee. “Not even if you’re totally going to be a Supreme Court justice.”
The late-night host then shared a message to the tune of a Dr. Seuss book. “You must not rape folks on a boat. You must not rape folks on a moat. You may not, must not after dinner. You cannot even if you’re a good swimmer. You must not rape a woman or man. You can quote me, Sam I am.”
“How is it never the right time to bring up assault allegations against a rich white dude?” Bee asked. “The woman Brock Turner raped reported it immediately, and I guess that wasn’t fair because it ruined his future. Christine Blasey Ford reported Kavanaugh’s alleged assault 36 years later and somehow she’s also ruining his future. How much future do rich white guys get to have?”
Bee also shared a clip of Kavanaugh in 2015 talking about his high school. “We had a good saying that we’ve held firm to this day, as the dean was reminding me before the talk, which is, ‘What happens at Georgetown Prep stays at Georgetown Prep.’ That’s been a good thing for all of us,” he said.
Bee quipped: “It’s kind of like my high school’s slogan. Toronto Tigers: We don’t rape.”
The host addressed the many individuals who have questioned if Kavanaugh’s actions in high school should impact his role as a Supreme Court justice. “Brett Kavanaugh is being considered to serve for life on the highest court of the land. The decisions he makes on the Supreme Court will impact women’s bodies for generations,” she said. “Of course if he assaulted someone when he was 17 and lied about it, it should impact him for the rest of his life.”
“Christine Blasey Ford didn’t ask for any of this shit. She did America a favor by coming forward with extremely relevant background information about an important job applicant,” said Bee. “It’s like if you were hiring an accountant. You’d want someone to tell you if he was also Wesley Snipes’ accountant, even if he was Wesley Snipes’ accountant when he was in high school.”
“It’s been 27 years since Anita Hill. Can we please try to be less horrendous about it this time? We’ve had enough of these ’90s reboots,” said Bee as photos of rebooted series including Will & Grace, Fuller House, Magnum, P.I. and Chilling Adventures of Sabrina appeared behind her.
Watch the full clip above.
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