‘The Vampire Diaries’: 9 Memorable Quotes From ‘All My Children’

Is Stefan veering back to his old self? Is Damon content with the fact that he will always be the bad guy? How will the Originals fend off the potentially tragic bind they’re now in?

The Vampire Diaries‘ “All My Children” might as well have been called “Originals Take Charge,” as much of the episode was fueled by two opposing sides, one who wants to kill the centuries-old vampires all in one fell swoop and the other who wants to spare a few. Here’s a countdown of the nine most memorable scenes from Thursday’s episode, in order of how they happened:

[Warning: Spoilers ahead.]

PHOTOS: 2011 CW Fall Premiere Party

1. “I can hear every word you’re saying about Damon and the vampire gigolo.” — Caroline to Bonnie and Elena

Said after Elena finds out about Damon’s .. extracurricular activities the night before with Rebekah and during Bonnie’s attempt to redo the privacy spell Originals’ mother Esther successfully did in “Dangerous Liaisons” in order to block off other vampires from overhearing.

2. “She’s better off without me. Sure is better off without you.” — Stefan to Damon

One of several verbal showdowns between the the Salvatore brothers during this episode and it comes right before they settle their differences over Elena — for the time being — so they can get focus on the task at hand: protect Elena before the Originals kidnap her. (Too late!)

3. “I’m a little embarrassed to admit but when it comes to killing thousand-year-old resurrected witches, I’m a little rusty.” — Damon

Another gem from the lips of Ian Somerhalder after Elijah tasks Damon and Stefan to help he and his siblings fight their mother so they can, you know, stay alive — by breaking the blood line of the witches (aka kill them). Specifically, by six minutes past nine o’clock, Elijah tells them. “Oh, how super specific of you,” Damon says sardonically.

PHOTOS: CW’s New Season TV Shows

4. Kol: “She certainly looks good walking away from you.”
    Klaus: “I’ll take that as a challenge.”

Continuing on his quest to win over Caroline, Klaus persuades her to sit with him and actually have a semi-normal conversation after he dares her. It’s a sweet moment that reminds us that they’re still young (well, sort of), but that “aww”-worthy scene is broken up moments later when Alaric stabs Kol, causing Rebekah, Finn and Klaus to feel the aftereffects briefly.

5. Alaric: “That kinda sucks, getting my ass kicked on a date.”
    Meredith: “Well that’s what you get, picking fights with guys 30 times your age.”

Shortly after the showdown between the Salvatores, Klaus, Kol and Alaric at the Mystic Grill proves unsuccessful, Alaric and Meredith (“the sexy psycho doctor,” as Damon called her early in the episode) have a .. moment.

6. “Thing is, she only has to hate one of us.” — Damon

Damon and Stefan have another one of their moments in the car as they use a coin toss to determine who will go underneath the church to save Elena. And whoever does it, she’ll hate forever. Meanwhile, Elena sees straight through Rebekah, who is holding a major grudge against the Gilbert. The task the chosen Salvatore must do: Turn Bonnie’s mother Abby into a vampire to break the witch bloodline. Pretty slick.

7. “All of you, you’re a curse on this earth stretched out over generations.” — Esther

It’s the climactic scene of the episode, when the siblings team up and face off against their mother Esther, who made them the way they are. Of course, it doesn’t pan out in Esther’s favor.

8. “I’m sorry Elena. I know that you want to help, but put yourself in her shoes, everything that happened tonight was to save you and that’s OK because she loves you so much. But somehow she’s always the one who gets hurt.” — Caroline

The truth hurts.

9. “I’m better being the bad guy anyway.” — Damon

Give the guy some credit. He never seeks out credit, only does what has to be done to save those around him. So when it’s revealed that Stefan was the chosen brother to turn Bonnie’s brother, Damon gets a few more brownie points. And to appease both groups of ‘shippers, Stefan points out the obvious to Damon, that he still loves Elena. (Of course he does, he said as much in “Dangerous Liaisons.”) So, by the end of the episode, both brothers are still toe-to-toe for Elena’s heart.

What did you think of the final scene, with Meredith shooting at (or in the direction of) Alaric? Does Stefan or Damon have the upper hand with Elena? What does Abby’s turn from witch to vampire mean for Bonnie and Elena’s friendship?

The Vampire Diaries returns March 15 with the episode “1912.”